“7 Diets You can Stick To” by E. Adams and John Burr is a very tongue-in-cheek parody of a number of recent fad diets, all of which have mixed results. In fact, the disclaimer up front states that “under NO circumstances should you apply the principles of ANY of these diets without consulting your local doctor. If your local physician does approve your use of any of these diets then you need to GET ANOTHER DOCTOR.” After reading this book, I’m very much inclined to agree with that recommendation. One author’s idea of exercise is to duct tape a brick to the TV remote, and move the mini fridge just out of reach of his spot on the couch, so that he has to stretch a little to reach his snacks. He quit smoking 20 years ago because emptying the ash trays was too much work. Throughout this book the authors seem to take turns using themselves as good examples of what not to do. They liken the book to one of those 'Scared Straight' camps for troubled youth.

First up for ridicule is the 'All White Diet' where apparently the dieter eats only foods that are white. The authors argue that even under a quart of gravy, the potatoes are still white, and therefore allowable. Then 'The Atkins Diet' is discussed; unfortunately, though, it was Chet Atkins’ diet, consisting of tuna salad sandwiches on white bread, sweet tea, and lots of guitar practice. They didn’t lose any weight, but did get marginally better at playing guitar. Once they got on the correct Atkins Diet, one author lost 45 pounds in 6 months but gained a kidney stone twice the size of a BB! The authors continue in this vein for a good hour and a half, filled with witty repertoire and an honest ability to laugh at themselves. As is clearly stated both at the beginning and again at the end, this book is NOT a serious diet book. It is, however, a very humorous parody of fad diets and the people who take them seriously. I recommend this book for anybody with a good sense of humor. For all its self-deprecation, this is a very well-written book, and is just plain fun reading.

"7 Diets You can Stick To" is a delightful little book that takes the reader into an excursion of ‘the absolute worst diets you can imagine’, guaranteed to give you a coronary and put on excess weight, while having fun along the way. The author states that carbohydrates are not the enemy as suggested in the ‘all meat’ Atkins diet. People develop kidney stones. As for powdered sugar donuts: ‘I know they are tiny heart bombs that dissolve in your mouth only to harden up into impenetrable walls of plaque in your arteries moments later, but who really needs all that blood and oxygen anyway?’ The ‘Four Days to Organic Failure Diet’ is basically starving yourself. You can guess what the ‘Drunken Diet’ is about. The ‘All you can eat buffet diet’ is a look at how much you can eat. The conclusion? There is really no magic diet. The simple truth: eat less and exercise more. If you are not hungry, don’t eat.

John Burr and E. Adams narrate a collection of amusing anecdotes from their culinary experiences. Although funny, they strike home, as many people actually live by following these bad eating habits. I laughed at some of the stories, but behind the scenes, what they have to say made me reflect, as it will other readers too. The booklet is well-written, and the authors don’t overwrite – a sin in many ‘true life’ stories. The conclusion is sobering and debunks diet fads, something we have known all along. It is a very entertaining diversion, and I recommend this book highly.